The Room

THE GIST: Johnny has it all: a good job, a nice apartment, a beautiful fiancé, and a great best friend. He also acts like he's on top of the world, often feeling generous with those around him. Shortly before the wedding, however, he discovers his girlfriend and his best friend are having an affair. The news wreck his perfect world and Johnny's life suddenly falls apart.

The Room is a very, very, very bad movie that I knew would be a train wreck and only watched because I wanted to watch James Franco's The Disaster Artist, which is about the making of this movie and got really good reviews.

Again, I knew what I was getting myself into, and hope you heed my advice and steer clear.

Tommy Wiseau is an atrocious actor with no talent whatsoever, which is even more apparent from his lousy script for this turd, which is only topped by his work behind the camera, which can only be defined as agonizing.

I just want to mention a sex scene between his character and the girlfriend that is probably the worst and least sexy sex scene I've ever watched. Ordinarily, little is shown and the plot moves on, implying that there was intercourse. Not here. The camera lingers on and on and on and on, clearly basking in the glory of Wiseau's own body, with no concept whatsoever about what makes a sex scene sexy or watchable. It's glorified self-aggrandizement with no clear purpose other than being tantalizing, clearly showing complete lack of vision on the part of a director.

The rest of the cast has no hope whatsoever of coming off as believable, given the lackluster and trite script.

THE BOTTOM LINE: Please, do yourself a favor and never watch this. It can't be undone. Unless, of course, it's for the same reason I did.

Grade: 1